Why Gen Z doesn’t see marriage as part of their American Dream

Traditionally, achieving the American Dream usually means going to college, getting married, buying a house and then having kids.

Gen Z may be more inclined to skip the marriage part, according to a recent CNBC and SurveyMonkey American Dream Pulse Survey. Among the survey’s 4,130 respondents, getting married was one of the least-important markers for feeling like they’d achieved the American Dream, lagging far behind achievements like financial stability, owning a home and simply being happy.

Just 37% of Gen Z respondents saw getting married as integral. That’s a departure. According to Pew Research Center data, two thirds (67%) of U.S. high school seniors surveyed in 2023 said they’ll most likely get married some day, but that’s down from 80% who reported the same in 1993.

Gen Zers are young, currently ages 14 to 29, with plenty of time to figure out the rest of their lives. But their relative disinterest in marriage, if it sticks around, could create problems for them later in life, ranging from loneliness to financial difficulties, suggest psychologists and money experts.

Single people under age 35 in the U.S. have a lower median net worth — roughly $22,000 for men and $9,000 for women — than similarly aged married couples, whose collective median is nearly $114,000, according to U.S. Census Bureau data. And 61% of married Americans say they’re “thriving” in life, compared with just 45% of those who have never married, according to a 2023 Gallup Poll.

“Data are really so clear that if you have somebody who loves you and somebody you love, you’re so much better off in life,” says John Gottman, a clinical psychologist, relationships expert and co-founder of The Gottman Institute, a Seattle-based couples counseling organization.

Those who do partner up are waiting longer. Many Gen Zers see marriage as more of a “capstone” experience than a “cornerstone” of their lives, Gottman says. In other words, they’re more likely than previous generations to want to accomplish at least some big life milestones on their own, before feeling ready to settle down and get married — or even prioritize their own happiness and satisfaction over the pursuit of marriage.

Here’s why, according to some Gen Zers, and what psychology and money experts say it means for the future of the American Dream.

Getting married may not directly encourage financial stability, homeownership or general happiness, but metrics like household wealth and reported life satisfaction are higher among married Americans. Still, marriage rates have plunged among young adults since 1980, according to Pew — and the U.S. has some of the least-happy young adults in the world, according to the World Happiness Report 2026, released on March 19.

A potential culprit: Gen Z may be lonely. Only 17% of U.S. adults under age 30 feel “deeply connected to at least one community,” found a poll from The Institute of Politics at Harvard Kennedy School, published in April 2025. Less social and community engagement means fewer chances to find a future partner who shares your values and makes you happy, which may help explain the country’s falling marriage rates.

A gendered split in education — and the economic opportunity that often comes with it — also contributes to Gen Z’s reticence to marry. Young women increasingly outpace men in bachelor’s degree attainment and economic opportunity for men without college degrees has deteriorated, shrinking the pool of men that women are more likely to see as suitable husbands.

Some men have turned toxic toward women in response, says Gottman. “We’ve seen the rise of a lot of misogyny recently,” he says, referencing the so-called “manosphere,” a catch-all term for online communities and influencers who decry feminism and encourage traditional gender roles in relationships. The trend certainly doesn’t help the country’s falling marriage rates, Gottman notes.

Against that backdrop, it’s no surprise that some young women could opt to pursue financial stability on their own. Until the 1970s, women needed a male guarantor, often a husband, to buy homes and get credit cards. Since then, their individual economic prospects have improved, and the gender wage gap has narrowed for some: Women ages 25 to 34 now earn $0.95 for every dollar a man in that age range makes, up from about $0.74 in 1982, according to Pew’s most recently available data, published in March 2024.

Isabel Crawford, a 25-year-old DJ and event photographer in New York City, says she grew up in Philadelphia assuming she’d go to college, get a good job and get married because that’s what her parents, grandparents and family friends all did. Moving to New York and witnessing unmarried women have successful careers and fulfilling lives has since inspired her to boycott marriage entirely, she says.

“Is it written on paper that women have to sacrifice [in marriage]? No, but they continuously do it, time and time and time again,” says Crawford.

Plenty of young Americans are still getting married, including some who previously rejected the notion. They’re just doing it later in life than previous generations.

Sarah Wu, a 29-year-old public relations professional in New York, grew up not wanting to get married — in part, because she struggled with her self-worth as a Chinese–American person in a predominantly white New Jersey suburb, she says. She tied the knot on June 27 after a journey of self-discovery — and meeting the right person, she notes. Finding her partner helped her realize that her negative view of marriage was a defense mechanism to protect herself from the pain of rejection, she says.

Wu’s timing aligns with her peers. The median age for Americans when they first get married was around 28 for women in 2025 and 31 for men, compared with 22 for women and 24 for men in 1980, according to U.S. Census Bureau data.

However, delaying marriage could have longer-term consequences for individuals, like waiting to access financial advantages like joint tax filing, shared health insurance and Social Security benefits. Getting too set in your ways financially before you get married could make it more difficult to accomplish shared goals with your spouse, says Douglas Boneparth, a certified financial planner and co-author with his wife Heather of “Money Together,” a book about how couples can navigate the emotional and psychological aspects of money.

“If you’re creating financial silos or operating too independently from a financial perspective, you’re actually doing yourself a disservice,” says Boneparth. Often, he adds, big goals “require more teamwork.”

But worrying about the future of your marriage depends on having one in the first place, and some Gen Zers say they can achieve their version of the American Dream on their own. Crawford, for example, says she anticipates enjoying more financial freedom in her 30s, as she grows her career. She gets much of the emotional fulfillment she needs from her platonic relationships, she adds.

“I’ve experienced so much from the women in my life, and I just can’t really imagine a man ever comparing to that, or being able to offer me, truly, the endless love that my friends offer me,” says Crawford.

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